As I Face Uncertain Futures…

I read the following at my father’s funeral mass – December 15, 2016 10.15 am.

“When a father gives to his son, both laugh”

stmichaelLast May when dad began moving in with my family he started by giving me the truths about his life. We laughed when we realized we had a lot in common. We shared common interests in, music, science and the truth; realizing that without love none of these were possible – My father never met a stranger. Everyone was a potential friend or more. Anyone who stood in a line with him for 5 minutes was laughing and sharing things instantly. Dad had a very trusting face. He quickly discovered a fondness for bingo and the ladies who played it. He was always taking a hand full of carnations with him. He made sure to have enough, he wanted to make sure every woman in the place felt appreciated. I think he did that at three different bingo halls. This flower arrangement below was designed so that the carnations can be taken easily- anyone is welcome to take one afterward.

“When a son gives to his father, both cry”

dadcollageWhile recovering from the initial brain surgery, dad took to reading my blog to understand what was going on with him. He knew my struggles to keep his care continuous, which I did from ER to Hospice. Dad’s last Saturday was a great day, we started with coffee and breakfast – as the day progressed he got to see all his daughters.  It was puppy day at the center and meeting those amazing animals inspired dad to request a trip outside on the boardwalk. That night before bed, I got dad to help me proofread a blog I was working on about “Lost hope” – he helped me understand where he was mentally- so through my words I gave my father his last. We cried as we finalized those words. He held my right hand as I leaned in to kiss him goodnight – he’d been giving me one since he woke up from his brain surgery. Our eyes were locked- both glassy and red- we both said “goodbye”, together. I gulped, then silently whispered  “I love you.” In return I received a tight squeeze of my hand and a smile through tears. We stared for an eternal moment, before I turned away to leave…

As I Face Uncertain Futures… I can say with Certainty that my Father will Always be in Mine.

“When a father gives to his son, both laugh; when a son gives to his father, both cry; yet, when they both give to each other, a bond is forged that none may break.”

(a possible Yiddish proverb or Shakespearean quote- yet, the last line is mine)

 

 

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